Style As You Age
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October 2024.
As I was drafting this (late at night in between sleeping children) I kept wondering “why am I writing this”, what has age got to do with it. I seem to care less about aging as I near 40 than I did in my 20s. Writing a newsletter about dressing as you age simply reinforces this idea that aging is something to worry about or cover up in some way.
When I was writing my list of content ideas in the summer, this one came up as a sort of offshoot of my “style after motherhood” newsletter which people loved. The reason I have been thinking about style and clothes is because:
A) I lost my sense of style after having children and going nowhere other than Sainsbury’s (although my trips there are sadly numbered after numerous embarrassingly loud visits with my children who screech me into buying them a packet of mince pies each, in October).
B) I now work in FASHION. Well, I don’t really. I work in manufacturing. But I’m putting photos of myself on the web and so I do care a bit what I look like. Plus, I am trying to sell jumpers and no one is going to buy a nice jumper modelled on a real life scarecrow.
C) I don’t want to embarrass my kids. I dropped my son off to school wearing wellies and he was embarrassed (I adore my Dunlop purofoots) but I don’t want to embarrass my children and I don’t want to drop them in gym kit because I don’t go to the gym and I would like to at least try to dress for the day ahead in a way that makes me look less tired and chaotic than I feel. Fake it til I make it.
I am 39 and I haven’t yet got into researching the menopause (why, oh why, don’t I know anything about it). But I do know that older women can feel invisible. I would love to go from frazzled mother of small children to menopausal mother of teens with a decent dose of style.
Oh look there goes the jumper lady filling up her car with power steering fluid again, but she always looks so stylish doesn’t she?
I’ve been trawling the web. Here are the things I thought were worth sharing.
1. Full length mirror
I listened to a snippet of a podcast on a long car journey about aging and the one thing I took away from it was “the best thing a women can do about aging is to buy herself a full length mirror”. This is good advice. You can be so overwhelmed by family life that you simply don’tbother looking in the mirror.
2. Ramp it up.
If you want to avoid becoming invisible, perhaps you you need to ramp-it-up. I used to ride with a lady who’s husband was an ambassador to the UK. We regularly went to drinks parties at the embassy and I remember being bowled over by these crowds of older mediterranean women looking simply spectacular. Bold colour, large bold jewellery and fantastic hair. I hope to be like that when I am older.
3. “Classic” items & style.
Decent shirts. Blazers. Trench coat. Loafers. Etc. If you Google this it comes up with suggestions like “classic cuts” and “less pattern”. But I get it and I mostly agree - basically trends are a bad idea and so, probably is too much print, hoodies (who actually wears these as an adult?) and “playsuits”. Sorry I said it. Well cut shirts, trousers, dresses, skirts, coats. Colours that work well together. Clothes that suit your shape - basic wardrobe / dressing rules that exist for a reason.
4. Not too much pattern.
Use pattern “with a light hand”, not to “spice up” your outfit. The best bit of advice I read was that incorporating texture is a more sophisticated way to elevate your look. I agree with this but it wouldn’t have occurred to me.
5. Invest in accessories.
Stylists love talking about the power of accessories. I have spoken about this before but I don’t want too many. They make decision making hard and they create clutter but the tip here is to “invest” in decent ones and avoid “patchwork, or anything that dangles, like charms and chain” which I found funny, I do agree that patchwork dangly accessories may not do you many favours 😂 .
6. Know your style.
I’m getting there with this, colours, shapes, cuts, I love a cropped jacket and I know that this recent trend for baggy jeans is an absolute no go for me now and forever more. Same goes for barrel legged jeans and super wide jeans. Even knowing this / deciding this feels good and grown up!
7. Style Icons.
Some blogs I read recommended this. I think it’s a good idea if you struggle a bit with what to wear. A few images of someone you aspire to look like, style wise, stuck on the wall somewhere. Or on a Pinterest board? I haven’t done this but I will. I gave it a go last night and honestly wasn’t sure what to Google. Any tips let me know.